A little girl at LaDawn's daycare about a year younger than Genny basically went unconscious and was struggling to breathe. It made for a harry morning and I took kids to McDonald's because they were all freaking out and it was a way to keep them distracted.

Then we went to Costco and then later to the hospital. The little one wasn't up from emergency yet, but came to visit LaDawn this afternoon while I was there. I cried when I saw her. I don't think it hit me entirely until I saw her and then it hit hard.

Unfortunately, that was a lot more running around that I really have a right to be doing right now. I need to be careful and cautious with my body and I didn't do that. I yearned last night for a percocet because absolutely everything in my body hurt. I slept for 12 hours and then it still took me several hours to get conscious. And my abdomen feels like someone went in and rearranged my insides -- I feel like I should be able to look down and see bruises.

It's the running story of my life, I guess. I am a member of the Women who Do too much Society.

Today, I was reading old poetry and thinking about how I need to get back to that. I have so much to say still.

I think it came up as I was listening to Christian music that LaDawn had left in my CD player in the car how Cartman on South Park decided to make a gold record with Christian music and that it was mostly just rearranging the words of various love songs. It was a ridiculous episode and I hadn't totally gotten it until I heard this album.

Then it made me sad.

It sucks to have Christian music that isn't really doing anything except praising God. Everyone knows that God is fabulous, wonderful, spectacular, etc. I guess I want more story and more about what happened that brings people to God. I know I went away and I came back. People are always fascinated by how and why I came back to God. I'm always fascinated by other people who were wild and crazy and then return to God, too. The avenues they take to get there are interesting. There has been 2000 years of music praising God, where's the story? I'm not saying that there shouldn't be music praising God, but I think it'd be better to have music telling people's stories of finding God.