Ok, so both state jobs fell through. The teaching one, they made it clear I was second choice and that they really liked me and told me to keep applying. It was one of the nicest rejection letters ever, really. So I start AT&T shortly. In the interim, Mike has an interview with a competitor of his old company that's local! We're rather stunned.

I was really sad about the state jobs, but I'm ok. I've got something and it'll help pay bills. Hopefully, over time, I'll put some money up and be able to go back to school to teach. If I work nights, that's an option.

Right now, we're hoping Mike gets hired out soon, so we can use the severance pay to put in a well here.

I checked with him and he said that all the contract work was in LA and the Bay area, though there's some in in Vegas, too. I priced out plane tickets and cheap apartments and he can get some deals in Vegas, anyhow. I found one place that has a shared cooking area, which I thought would rock. His brothers live in LA and the Bay area, so he may be able to stay for a week here and there, too, certainly to start off with.

Ok...bottom line? This up in the air crap is kicking my ass. I'm between losing my mind and losing my house, so it's definitely rock and hard place material.

Oh, and my stupid car is in the driveway...not working -- AGAIN. We went to AAA and upgraded our stupid membership, so I can get the danged thing towed to the garage. Mike giggled,"At least, they can't repo it, right now." I rolled my eyes, but he's right.

It's not going anywhere until Thursday, though because AAA takes 2 days. So Mike will probably follow us down to the garage and I'll beg my mechanic to start on it and do what he can. There's something hinky with the electric system and I'm rather ticked I spent $100 to fix jack on the danged thing at the garage here in town.

I need it fixed by the time I start working though. Mike needs an emergency car and a car to go to interviews with.

Life is so frustrating lately. I just hope we can get through.

Well, we haven't heard spit from the company in Florida -- not even Mike's check. I'm not amused.

I haven't heard from my state positions either, which blows, so still waiting on them. I don't know if they're checking references and are facing the whole holiday thing or what, but it's frustrating to just wait. I know for a fact that I start on January 12th with AT&T, so I'm taking comfort in that.

I hope something works out.

Still a waiting game on the employment front. We're just waiting.

We're baking and finishing up shopping.

I feel overwhelmed a lot, but it's just where things are. I'm going to probably go nuts and bake a ton just for the heck of it. I don't feel motivated to eat it much, but I really enjoy the baking part.

I've been watching Christmas shows and listening to music and decorating and just getting into the Christmas groove. Tonight's baking was snickerdoodles with colored sugars.

There's been a lot of snow. We're in the shadow of Tahoe, so we get all the spillover, so they've gotten 7 feet at upper elevations and we've probably gotten a total of 7 inches. It's melted away some and then it returns. We're getting the first white Christmas in 5 years. I think that means we aren't going to try to cross the mountains, that and the van is dead in the driveway the way it was in October. I am not amused.

We're still waiting on the lousy reimbursement from his Florida interview. I finally called and said that we put together every last dime we had to get him there and that we would appreciate it, if they'd fed ex that check to us. Apparently, the check was cut today, so hopefully, it'll be here tomorrow.

That's a company that sincerely needs a corporate card, dude.

Well, Mike has heard nothing. With the holidays, I don't know if that's good or bad -- just what is going on.

I have heard from ATT and officially am employed by them as of January 12th. I applied for two state jobs last week, and I'll hear about them before the new year and then can figure out if I'm doing that or going to ATT. Considering the money, I'm thinking state job. :) I am pretty much starting out at the top of my pay range for ATT and with their recent layoffs, I kind of think there's not a lot of up to go there. I'd like to make money and support my family, not just be able to pay the mortgage and live off Mike's severance til it's gone.

I'm going to take whatever I get, though, and hope to God that Mike gets something soon. The state job I applied for on Friday -- one of the gals took me aside and talked to me all the way down the hall and said, "Have him apply into our department. We're stable and not likely to get nailed any more with the budget cuts." So Mike is applying. He has to go to the DMV and get a printout because he knows he's had tickets, he just can't remember any of the circumstances of them and he needs to write those into the application. Tomorrow, we'll have $7, so tomorrow, he'll do that.

Mike is flying to Florida for an interview.

He had a phone interview today with someone else and expects to fly to Vegas next week. Another company contacted him, too, so he's got to call them tomorrow.

I'm staying here to keep the kids normal and work. I've got 3 days of 5th graders.

It's freaky around here. I've also got 2 more interviews this week, too, with state jobs. I had to schedule them after work, so I feel a little concerned about how I'm going to look after a day of teaching. One would be as a trainer and I need to know how to use powerpoint. I was told I have to show them how to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I made a powerpoint for it and I'm bringing it with me and doing a whole presentation for fun.

Yeah, I'm such a weirdo. :)

Both jobs would pay more than the AT&T job, but I have the ATT job to fall back on at the least.

I don't get much time to myself lately. I spend a lot of time helping Mike follow up on all job leads, editing his emails and cover letters, and making sure he's called everyone and all that. It's not that he can't do a decent job himself, but rather that he's been out of the game a long time and he's doublechecking things. And I'm good at it, by gum.

Add this to my own job application process, followups, and working part-time teaching, and I'm a busy gal.

So yesterday, I had my once a month check with the doctor. My weight's up, which blows because I've been walking a lot, but the doctor said with the stress I've been experiencing that weight gain wouldn't be unexpected.

But the thing that got me was, that the minute the nurse left the room, I just melted into tears. I get so little time to slow down or do anything for me, that that 15 minutes of dr. visit just let me just have time for me. She asked if I had been sleeping, and I laughed and said, "Sleep is for pussies!" And I admitted I don't sleep much at all. I'm often up in the middle of the night, searching the net for jobs, reading email or just obsessing, while dinking around on the net. She gave me xanax to calm me down, once in a while. When I came out, I was sure Mike would see the tears and I just explained it to him on the way to the car.

I went home and fell face first on the bed and slept for 3 hours. When I stirred, he packed up the kids and took them out. He dragged the unwilling, whiny teenager around and they got Bear's phone fixed and walked over the the video game store. Then they walked to Starbucks and he bought the kids a strawberry frappucinos and then they went to the Apple store to look at their goodies. Whiny teenager boy kept claiming he wasn't cold, but by the end of their jaunts back and forth across the parking lot, he was shivering and glad to get into the car.

Everyone had a bit of story to tell me when they got back, but I appreciated the down time, too. My hubby rocks!

Mike's had interviews. He's to be flown to Vegas for one and to Florida for another. I got offered the job from ATT, but it doesn't start until January 12th. It's somewhat tentative, but not really. I'm going in for a trainer interview with the state on Thursday.

While AT&T wouldn't transfer to Florida, it would transfer to Vegas, so we have that option. It may mean that Mike has the kids with him, while I do the 4-6 week training and then I mention to them after I've completed the training that my husband got offered a job in Vegas and I'd like to transfer. If his interviews don't go anywhere, we could survive on my AT&T salary, unemployment and his severance and I would get excellent benefits, when COBRA runs out.

I'm working as much as I can as a substitute. I got lucky yesterday and checked the program from a job and picked up 3 days next week. The problem is that I am going to have to reschedule my interview, so calling them to set that up. For that interview, they want me to demonstrate how to make a PBJ, so I pulled "Peanut Butter Jelly Time" off the net and am bringing almond butter because I'm allergic to peanut butter. I've already researched the history, calories, and the like for making a PBJ and have the whole thing planned out.

I scare myself.