I don't get much time to myself lately. I spend a lot of time helping Mike follow up on all job leads, editing his emails and cover letters, and making sure he's called everyone and all that. It's not that he can't do a decent job himself, but rather that he's been out of the game a long time and he's doublechecking things. And I'm good at it, by gum.

Add this to my own job application process, followups, and working part-time teaching, and I'm a busy gal.

So yesterday, I had my once a month check with the doctor. My weight's up, which blows because I've been walking a lot, but the doctor said with the stress I've been experiencing that weight gain wouldn't be unexpected.

But the thing that got me was, that the minute the nurse left the room, I just melted into tears. I get so little time to slow down or do anything for me, that that 15 minutes of dr. visit just let me just have time for me. She asked if I had been sleeping, and I laughed and said, "Sleep is for pussies!" And I admitted I don't sleep much at all. I'm often up in the middle of the night, searching the net for jobs, reading email or just obsessing, while dinking around on the net. She gave me xanax to calm me down, once in a while. When I came out, I was sure Mike would see the tears and I just explained it to him on the way to the car.

I went home and fell face first on the bed and slept for 3 hours. When I stirred, he packed up the kids and took them out. He dragged the unwilling, whiny teenager around and they got Bear's phone fixed and walked over the the video game store. Then they walked to Starbucks and he bought the kids a strawberry frappucinos and then they went to the Apple store to look at their goodies. Whiny teenager boy kept claiming he wasn't cold, but by the end of their jaunts back and forth across the parking lot, he was shivering and glad to get into the car.

Everyone had a bit of story to tell me when they got back, but I appreciated the down time, too. My hubby rocks!