I got home from class at 10PM Wednesday and I'd been letting the relish ferment most of the day in my sauerkraut crock. I started to get the sugars and spices and everything nices together and realized I was out of tumeric because the darned jar is brown and I hadn't actually OPENED it to verify that it was chalk full of tumeric. My kind, darling husband ran out to get me some with the promise that green tomato relish is the ambrosia of the Gods pushing him onward, so I held off on adding stuff til he got back about 11. At 11, I started adding stuff in. Mid-way through adding things, he says he's going to bed. I get kisses from him, I get jars sterilizing in pots, I get relish stuff going and I've got exhaustion crawling over me like a swarm of ants on honey.

I keep running back and forth to the computer in the next room to verify my ingredients and finally, I think I've got everything, so I start cooking it up. I cook and I cook and I boil and boil. I spoon, dollop, and I get all 15-20 quarts of the double batch canned. The whole time I am doing this, I think,"It just doesn't smell right." I tasted a little and it was awfully close, but it was missing something. So I'm lying there in bed, in a slightly befuddled state because it *is* 130 AM and I groan when I realize that I forgot the vinegar.

So Friday, I dumped it all back into my crock, added the vinegar and re-canned it all AGAIN.

And last night, we had some on chicken sausages and oh, my yum!

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The only other thing that is going on is that last week, in an interview I had at Mike's company, I told the woman,"I don't know what I want to be when I grow up." And that phrase, while probably totally inappropriate in a job interview, has stuck with me all week. I really don't know what I want to do, but whatever it is that I have been doing is not working for me. I have the option, financially, to actually stop working for a bit and regroup. I am sending out resumes rather half-heartedly and I am following up with them and all that, but I just have the definite sense of uncertainty. I talked with Mike today and he told me as long as we have the money to pull it off, that I should do whatever I want. I want to be a housewife and stay-at-home mom for a little while. I want to try selling stuff on ebay. I am going to make some more relish this week. I want to buy some chickens and sell "farm fresh" eggs. I want to sew, go to class, exercise, work on my yard, etc. Mike asked if I'd get bored. I said,"Maybe, and if I do, I'll go get a job." I am also looking into the grant writing thing more and more. I think I can do this and make it fly. I just have to figure out how and actually do it. I have some time to experiment and explore, so I'm going to use it to my best advantage. I had a numerologist at the Whole Earth Festival do my numbers. She blanched when she saw where I'd been. She promised me a future where she could see me giving talks or communicating to large audiences for big bucks. I just hope she didn't mean deer.

And no, I don't have new pictures up yet. I will though and you'll be the FIRST to know.