I'm way too tired for my body and my age. I should be young and bouncy again or at least well laid. I have stayed up way past my bed time the past couple nights doing homework and contract stuff and it's been rugged. Of course, I've slept restlessly because I am worrying and stressing. Today, I took a nap and was supposed to get up when Mike called and he called and I was so out of it, I begged off and crashed and burned.

I slept for a couple hours, but the only reason I got up was because I had to pee. Being that I was up anyhow, peeing, I decided to rip off the flannel nightgown and stumble into the shower. It was stupid, I realise in retrospect because the day has only fallen apart since into foggy-brained stumblings through email, more contract work and I swear all I want to do is make this one quilt block.

I was at Wal-mart, last night, at the fabric counter and I saw a sign for a quilt block contest that they are sponsoring for the "heart of America." The quilt blocks get turned into quilts for kids in the Children's Miracle Network, so it's a no lose thing. The woman at the counter showed me the only one someone had turned in and it was buttugly, so I am making my own. Of course, my idea requires being appliqued, which I don't know how to do, yet, so it ought to be interesting. I have to stitch CS's quilt and I think I've finally given up on being able to get the thing done all by hand, so I'm stitching it with the machine this weekend and she'll just have to forgive me. I just don't want her baby to be a toddler before she gets it...or a teenager, for that matter.

I think Mike is mad at me. I'm kind of mad at me, too.

Pauline called and needed money. We didn't have tons, but we had a little to help, so I paid two of her bills and basically I told her she needed to get into a smaller place she can afford and I sent in a low-income request to her utility company on her behalf, so they can reduce the cost of her bills. Mike let me do it, but he was not thrilled about it. I wish now, that I'd stood by my guns about sending the smaller amount. I love my friends, but I love my husband more. Her roommated got pulled over on parole with a DUI. I don't know why she'd have such a person living with her, other than desperation, but I am thinking about going down there and having one of those heart-to-hearts with her. She needs better friends.