Vegas...

Day 1: We left for the airport and got halfway there and realized Genny forgot her glasses. We called the window guy and asked if he'd fed ex them to us. We went to the Luxor and went on one of those sit in the seat that jiggle and have the theater move around you things. It was fun, but I'm not sure it was worth the $40 for all of us to do it. We also stopped at little shops and stuff along the way from the Mandalay way. I found a dress that would fit Genny for $158 dollars -- it was a denim jumper that was very cute, but I could buy a lot more jumpers at Walmart for that amount of money. Nonetheless, Genny doesn't own that jumper.

We ate at a fancy hamburger place. They had a hamburger that ran $60 that had goose liver pate and truffles among other things. Our burgers were more along the $8- 10 range, but they were really good. Expensive, but good. For dinner, we were tired, so we ordered Domino's pizza, a salad, and a couple liters of soda, watched "Batman Begins" in the room. Genny fell asleep in Mike's arms -- way cute.

Day 2: We went to the Vegas Outlet. I found a lot of good deals and bought Bear a pair of swim trunks, so we could swim at the Mandalay Bay Pool. Gosh, their pool is amazing. Their wave pool, isn't one of those wimpy wave pools, it really seems more ocean-like I think because of the size of the swells, and the current they generate under the water. To be in a pool with undertow was way cool. Their lazy river was very nice,too. I spent a good hour circling in that and really liked the waterfall beating down on my back -- best massage I've had in a bit. We took the kids to the Vegas Hofbrau for dinner, where we all enjoyed participating in German drinking songs, the beer was actually drinkable, and I sang,"Du, Du liegt mir im Herzen..." to Genny over and over again, at her request. I'm embarrassed a little because I only know the first words to "Ach du lieber, Augustine." For some reason, the other song is burned into my brain. Oh, the things I did in college!

Day 3: We had been planning to go to Hoover Dam and I just simply hadn't been feeling very well. We drove around Vegas a bit. Genny had had a pee accident on the first day and we really were looking for a means of laundering her clothes,which we never did, but we drove around a bit looking. We stopped at Walmart to get stuff we didn't have, we stopped at a market to pick up snacks and stuff. We did make reservations at Excalibur to do the dinner theater thing -- dinner without utensils while watching faux jousting and swordplay. The kids LOVED the thing. I was having to stick pieces of food into Genny's mouth throughout because she was sitting there slackjawed enthralled with the whole thing. She made it through some of the food and just loved the whole thing. Both kids did.

Afterwards, we had to do the whole arcade thing there which ended up being a lot of fun. The kids and I ended up with Norse helmets. Mine and Russell's had enormous horns on each side and Genny had more of the cute little norse girl helmet. We walked through a couple casinos while people smirked and pointed. It was an awful lot of fun. Somewhere in the process, Russell broke one of the horns off, so he was running around with the one horn on the front exclaiming,"I'm a rhinocerous! Here me roar! ROAR!" I was smiling from ear to ear. That's my boy! Several drunken fratboy types found it hilarious at NY, NY. We went there because the kids really wanted to ride the rollercoaster, but when Genny was too short to ride it, Russell said he'd wait a year til she was taller. I was so proud of him! We did some of the arcade there and I stopped at an oxygen bar for 20 minutes and got a shoulder massage. We dragged home about midnight and all dropped into bed, wiped.

Day 4: Our last official day there, I decided I was claiming my birthday present. I made an appointment at the spa for a full hour massage. They asked me if I minded a man and I said no. My shoulders are so tight that it requires strong hands to beat them into shape. I had hurt the whole trip, I think from the elevation drop of 3000 feet and I couldn't wait for the massage. I went down to the spa, bubbled away in the non-chlorinated hot tub and thought of nothing at all. I sat in the lounge afterwards sipping water with cucumber slices until I was called by Dave the masseuse.

If Dave had not made it clear that I reminded him of his Mom and the fact that he was all of 25, I would have been happier, but it was okay. I think it made it sexually safe for him. I'm not old enough to be his mother, though at the time, I felt old enough to be his grandmother. However, Dave had strong hands. Dave could find the knots and talk them out of their tangles. When I walked out of Dave's room of bliss, I had tipped him a LOT. More specifically, when I walked out of there, I could walk.

When I got back, the natives were restless and we had lunch at the House of Blues. It was good chow and then we walked what seemed an eternity to go visit the shark reef. By this time, Dave's handiwork was starting to fall apart because my back was starting to ache. The shark reef was a lot of fun and very interesting. I have to say I liked the tank of jellyfish. It was a cylindrical tank with reduced lighting and the jellyfish were kind of pulsing and glowing a little ultraviolet and it was way cool. We also enjoyed watching the critters get fed in the tidal pool tank, where you could manhandle things if you wanted, though during feeding we were instructed NOT to put our hands in the tank.

Speaking of hands in the tank -- what kind of sickos have an open pirahna tank, cordoned off only by those brass and velvet bank/airport thingies? I'm just asking here.

The kids were tired and begged to go swimming with me. Mike, however, had turned into the vacation nazi and insisted that we had to "do the Strip." Of all the shit I'd like to do with kids, "The Strip" was not on the list. We started down, found the M&M store and then ate at the Monte Carlo. I was feeling pretty uncomfortable, so handed Mike $20, told him to take the kids to the arcade, while I played on a machine until I felt better. He smirked and left.

When the money ran out, the kids were tired and begging to leave, and we were all so freaking tired that we figured we'd get a cab. Yeah...a cab on Friday night in Vegas. What the hell were we thinking? Then Mike swore he knew the way and proceeded to get us lost through the back streets of Vegas trying to get to our freaking hotel. It was awful. The kids and I whined at him and bitched him out the whole way, which of course, he returned in kind.

It took us a full hour to get what would have been a block or so. When you're tired, it really sucks ass.

We finally got back to the hotel and then we had to pack up all the crap because we had to leave to get to the airport in the morning. Big. Freakin. Fun.

I ended up doing most of it and that pissed me off no end.

Oh, well.

Day 5: We drove all over the place trying to find breakfast and then KISMET! We found a bagel place right next door to Starbucks. I was saved! I snarfed my latte while eating a toasted garlic bagel. Then we dropped off the car and flew home.

Coming home to the newly slated front entry way and all of my beautiful newly installed windows, glistening in bright newness was fantabulous.


So that's my trip.