Okay, so last week, I got a sleep study. I have apnea episodes at a rate of 2 per minute in REM sleep. Freakin' scary as hell. Tonight, I am getting figured out for a CPAP machine, which is essentially a machine that pushes air in into your lungs to keep one's airway open when you're sleeping. What they will be figuring out is how much pressure I need to have to keep my airway open while I sleep.

When folks are awake, the muscles that hold the airway open keep it open, but because you relax when you sleep, the muscles can relax and in apnea, the airway closes. Apnea results in lots of mini-awakenings in the course of the night as the sufferer gasps for air and that means that people who have it never get a good night's rest.

Because people with untreated sleep apnea are 15 times more like to have a car wreck than the rest of the world and because 90% of the time, my children are in my car with me, I've been driving as little as possible. My husband, who we have always thought was a worse driver than me, is driving whenever possible until I get hooked up at home on a machine, which should happen shortly.

I told friends that I am looking forward to rejoining the human race. I am also mourning the lost time I've experienced so far. It's hard to be this exhausted and non-functional. However, it explains lots of aches and pains, experiences, and even my difficulties recovering from sore muscles over the years. It also explains my difficulties reading texts in the past several years.

I was beginning to think I was getting Alzheimer's or something and it scared me half to death. This issue at least is treatable.

I'm just hopeful for all the things it will change in my life.