I'm trying really hard to be motivated to live. I distinguish that from being motivated NOT to die. Being motivated to live seems more empowering to me, though not wanting to die, has its own rewards.

Today, I swam for nearly an hour. It wasn't a hard hard workout, but it was a workout. I went with a new friend, Leann, and she and I swam laps and talked the whole time. It was really fun. I suddenly realized I'd been swimming for an hour, so I decided I needed to stop because there was that whole wanting-to-be-able-to-move-tomorrow thing. Mostly, just my achilles tendon is tight, so I've been doing little stretches and I took some alleve, so I sleep ok. Otherwise, I'll wake myself up all night, kicking about.

My sugars are starting to normalize. The highest sugar I had today was 150, which was a lot better than last night, after a careful meal's 178! I swam last night, too, in order to bring it down.

I'll swim again tomorrow at Mel and Dan's. We're going to have a BBQ there and hang out. Thankfully, they also have air conditioning. The swamp cooler has been sucking ass in all the thunderstorm humidity we've had lately.

Well, it's later than hell. I need to sleep because I have to go to Sylvia's and make her the chicken marinade at 11AM. Even cooks need their sleep.