I called my mom and dad and told them all the health news.

My mom totally understood about the thyroid. She's been there. She understands what it means to go from a quarter grain to 3 grains of thyroid in a year and a half's time. She understood when I said that while I could die from the bariatric surgery, that I was definitely going to die without it. I explained to her that my doctors had all recommended it. I told her about Dr. B crying.

My dad was another story. He railed and kvetched at me about how I just needed to eat right. I explained that I couldn't have the kinds of consistent lab results that I do with my diabetes, if I was actually eating like crap. I explained that I've been doing what my doctor says. He finally backed off. I felt bad. I finally said,"Dad, I know you love me and that's what this is about. I need to know that you love me and I appreciate how worried you are. I'm worried, too."

There was a long pause, while I held back tears. I said,"I love you, Dad." He said, "I love you, too." I said I had to get Genny and we hung up. Then I went inside LaDawn's and sat in a chair in the dark staring at the Christmas tree weeping.

I just feel like if I start crying right now that I won't stop. I've been crying on and off all day. It just feels like one more straw on this camel's back.

I told Mike that I've been teaching him how to do stuff, so that if I die, he can take care of the kids. He said something about how I should really try not to die and I said that I'm working like crazy not to. I also asked him to please take care of himself and work to make better choices. His idea of breakfast sometimes is to eat a poptart from the vending machine at work -- even though we have bagels, muffins, and cereal. I reminded him that he's in several high risk groups for diabetes, including that it runs in his family, he carries his weight in his belly, he's overweight, and he's Native American. He's agreed to work on it.

I've got stuff to do before I hit the hay...laundry waits for no woman.

I think the best part of the day was praying with LaDawn on the phone.

The second best part of the day was getting my Clay Art stoneware at Kohl's because I could actually get there in my wheelchair. This guy in the store was watching Mike running through the store with me,practically doing wheelies and scaring the crap out of me, and whined,"I want a ride!"

While Mike was checking out, I was sitting holding Genny and kissing on her, the ride guy came by and whined,"I want a ride!" again and I said,"Wreck your knee really bad and then you can have a ride, too!" He smirked and walked away.

Giving it to God when I can is always the biggest relief. Being a smart alec provides comic relief.

Taking relief where I can, I tell you whut.