On my kid's email list, someone's daughter experienced menarche -- her first period. While some women were extending congratulations to her through her mom I wasn't sure if I should offer congratulations or condolences.

Hey, welcome to the next 25 years of ruined underwear, horrible cramps, mood swings, and risk of pregnancy.

Whee! You're becoming a woman!

Enjoy your bleed. Have a nice day!

---

I've been working all day. Some of it is because one of my instructors' parents had a horrible car wreck. Her dad hasn't ever come out of the coma and neurosurgery has made no difference in his condition, which is just plain sad. I emailed a lot of people and it's just been a long afternoon around that and organizing a mess into something sensible for another prof. I still haven't started looking at the advisement manuals the Chair gave me.

Let's not even review the Laundry Mound (LM) that has started taking over the spare space in the garage and I think might have eaten some small rodents in its path. I will let you know if I find pellets in the dryer lint filter. We could reconstruct the skeletons and see what lives in my garage with LM and get a sense of what kind of rodentia preferences LM has. I wonder if LM will restrain children. Oh, the possibilities!

Last night, Mike and I had a date. We rented a video (Secondhand Lions), a pizza (BBQ chicken, red onions and sundried tomatoes) and watched it at my office at the uni. We really liked the video, so we'll probably buy the DVD for home. Afterwards, we went to a casino and I won $14 at the roulette table. I was up about $50 at one time, but if I'm playing on their money, I play until the husband gives me the "I wanna go home because I'm tired" nod. I played and then I got the nod, and while I had had several nods, this was a persistent nod which coincided with my bursting bladder, so he cashed in for me, while I raced to the nearest potty. I like dating my best friend. It reminds me why he *is* my best friend.

I reduced LM by running the dryer before we hit the sheets and the laundry facilities have been going full blast all day long. The really cool thing is that the house is clean to boot.

Definitely, a better semester at home.

I'm just really tired.

I worked my ass off on this stupid powerpoint presentation for my families class. I put sound in, I timed it, I had timed slides, I edited pauses out of the sound and it comes out at 7:57 and I have an 8 minute maximum. I get to class excited. And then it wouldn't work. I got home, told Mike, and he says,"I told you about that packaging thing a few days ago."

"Um, no you didn't."

"I was sure I did."

"Um, NO, you didn't."

Nonetheless, it now works, but I presented two minutes over. Fucking technology. At least I have a portfolio piece now.

Microsoft bastards.

The same day, I had the second IEP meeting in which the principal tried to tell me that I couldn't bring people to the meeting. Fortunately, my advocate informed her that by federal law I could bring whoever I wanted. The principal's jaw snapped shut and that was that. (I mean, was she going to tell me I couldn't have the advocate there, for Pete's sake?)

The IEP as it's written blows donuts, so we'll be working on the specifics between now and the BIG IEP meeting in May to clean it up.

One thing I found disturbing is that on some of the achievement testing, Bear scored off the charts. If that's the case, then why with all the work he is putting in is he only pulling B's and C's? I guess that means he meets the criterion for discrepancy. Either that or his teacher meets the criterion for "crappy." I think there's discrepancy, however, it's still bothersome to me.

I did research on the "who can come to the IEP meeting" for my other class. We are comparing and contrasting the difference between the IEP and the 504. I get to do the families aspect, so I called people and found out who can, by law, come to the IEP meeting. So far, I've only found information on the State law, but I'll be looking up IDEA on a legal site to find out what the stuff is there. I've heard a couple of catch phrases bandied about, so I'll be looking for those.

I've been informed that I am a geek. I've read way too much science fiction, I know too much computer crap, and apparently, and most importantly, I bite the heads off chickens. (Okay, okay, not really. I pet my chickens and tell them they're pretty. I collect their eggs and I promise them a rooster some day.)

I personally think I qualify as a nerd. I think anyone who spends the kinds of hours I do working on homework to pull down that A qualifies as a nerd and Mike and Sarah are just jealous. Hah! I think Mike is more of the geek. I especially like the definition for geek of: " n. previously a 4 letter word, now a 6 figure salary."

As a grad student, in that context, I'm definitely a nerd.

Today, however, just call me "Goddess of the Laundry."

Mike took me to the town he proposed to me for Valentine's day. We got a room and hung out.

We were both struck by the quiet. No children = a great deal of quiet

We watched Star Trek, uninterrupted. We ate uninterrupted. We shopped uninterrupted. We screwed uninterrupted. By far the most luxurious thing we did, however, was to go to a bookstore and browse for books. We browsed and bought and read together. And the drive to and from -- 3 hours each way, we got to talk with each other. We got to think out loud with each other. We discovered that we are still best friends.

I miss him so much. I know it's weird, but to sleep in the same house and have lunch together, doesn't always mean we get that much time together. Often, we're working so hard to keep the house going and the kids managed that our conversations are half-conscious stringings of words in the wee hours of the morning in that tween time of wakefulness and rapid eye movement, where conversations stop when one of us starts snoring.

I got to clarify a few things and thank him and he did some of the same.

It's not very romantic to go out on Valentine's day, but rather expected. However, this was one of the most romantic and serene times I've spent with Mike in a long time.

I must be in grad school because I'm tired.

On the good news front, I am learning to organize my time and set boundaries.

One of the professors that I had last semester for literacy is pushing -- like being an overbearing conniving butt -- to get me to take on tutoring at a school that would be an hour away from home. Um, too damned far for $9/hour. I sent him the following snippet via email and bcc'ed my advisor to cover my copious butt.

Additionally, I love working with kids and obviously, I love teaching. However, I am not really able to add extra time (to tutor) to my schedule this semester beyond my GA-ship and specifically, I am only taking 2 classes because of that. My son is struggling, as I indicated, and his needs and the needs of my family come first. I may have time in the summer, as well as time next fall, but I am in the middle of a strenuous IEP process for my son to get him the supports he needs to be successful in school. I am also taking him to a pediatric neurologist because he is having symptoms that indicate that the medication he is taking may be having an adverse affect on him or may be bringing out some level of pre-existing condition such as Cerebral Palsy or Tourette's. Nonetheless, this is a stressful time for me and my family as we struggle to find what is best for my son; a lot of my time outside of work and school is being used to work with and for him.

He's still pushing. Nuisance.

What's worse is that I have been taking the ticket on that guilt train. I love to teach and I wish I was doing that rightthisminute, but if I don't get all this other stuff done, I'm going to end up stuffed in the nearest loony bin. I'll be the one drooling in the corner while I make my lips buzz and start and stop the buzz with my finger for the pure joy of listening to the temporary cessation of the raspberriness. I may even end up with my son in their writing program this summer. He needs as much help as he can get and they have a "writing camp" that I know he'd benefit from.

Of course, if I do that, I better find him a chess camp.

Oh, and MY WORD, martial arts are expensive. We went to this place in the big town (30 minutes away) and checked out this place we'd heard about. Russell seemed really interested, but wowsers, they wanted $99/month with a $200 deposit and a year contract. The money alone was daunting, but then the class times were a complete conflict with my school and family schedule and would have meant spending even more money for the whole family to eat out. If we lived in town, I might have considered it, but we don't. It'd be tons of time away from home -- driving, eating, etc. Mike and I discussed it late into the night and we both said,"Not right now." The problem is that I will be in school in the fall and I have to complete specific requirements to get my licensure and I don't have tons of control over some of those class times, but I still need to take them. I don't want to have to start and then stop this stupid thing if they are going to hold a $200 deposit over my head.

I can get swim lessons for $27/month. I could arrange to do it on my nights off from school and then while he swam, I could work out. Because the scheduling works out nearly perfectly, I am calling tomorrow to see about setting that up for the Bear.

Yep, I think we're doing that much cheaper thing.

I had the IEP meeting yesterday. There were 13 people there -- me, husband, a parent-to-parent advocate, two close friends, a district rep, the spec. ed teacher, the counselor, the reg. ed teacher, the principal, the clinical aide, the speech pathologist and the occupational therapist. Who says schools don't use intimidation to scare parents off?

However, in answer to that, my advocate said it was really good that I ran the meeting. The school district person had tried to run it, but I figure it is my kid and I called the meeting, so I had the right to run the agenda, which I had spent the past two weeks writing up, editing, and researching. I made copies of several strategy/methodology things for the regular ed teacher.

We agreed that he is going to be given less homework, and that his IEP needs a lot of work. They agreed to do all of the assessment testing I asked for -- even sensory integration. I was stunned.

Miracles really can happen.